Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Just Be


There are moments when sleep is delicious. Better than any silky, creamy mouthful of cheesecake or the sharp tang of lemonade and ice in the summer. I think that it is the heaviness of sleep that I like the most. That feeling of weightlessness and immobility that occur simultaneously.

In the winter, as I lie between the worn flannel sheets under the solid weight of the down covers in absolute comfort, the perfect position, no twinges or itches to make me move, with Bubba's warm solidity next to me and the darkness outside cloaking everything, I feel heavy and still. In those rare moments when the house is quiet except for the whum of the air through the vents and Bubba's soft breathing noises and I am slack with sleep but aware, that weight is the most comforting and comfortable sensation I can imagine. In those even more precious moments when my mind is truly synchronized with my body and I am only aware but not alert, straining to see the red numbers on the clock or flexing my ears to listen for the whine of the dog or sparking my brain to begin wondering, I am at peace. This moment, this feeling, this discrete space in time is. It just is.

There will be time for waking and working and moving, but when I find those snatches of peace in every realm and don't feel the need to stretch them out (which makes them pop like so many soap bubbles) or make them last or dispel them myself before they run out on their own, I am grateful for the heaviness of sleep.

5 comments:

chris said...

Now I am ready to leave work, go home & sleep!

Deb Shucka said...

So wise and so lovely. May you your moments of peace be abundant.

Carrie Link said...

Beautiful!!!

pennyjars said...

Just as I was debating how to spend the late hours between book and bed, you've convinced me. Get good sleep, indeed. :)

alwaysmomof4 said...

My body and mind have rested well for the first time in months and I'm so grateful for the renewal I feel. You are so right, sleep, deep heavy sleep is delicious.

Since Jordan died I never know when I lay my head down if sleep will come. It is precious and wonderful.
Jackie

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