Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Don't Go Unless You Can Go Big!

Medical mystery man (aka SuperMegaPancreas Man) strikes again! It seems that the one mass we thought was contained in his small intestine/stomach is actually three. This blows my theory that my husband is unwillingly harboring Osama Bin Laden in his gut. Although perhaps Ayman al Zawahiri and Amin al-Haq are the other two hiding in there with him...


In any case, biopsies have been obtained (32 of them - my husband has a difficult time doing anything on a small scale - have we talked about his barbecues?) so that we can indeed determine whether these tumors are as evil as they appear to be. Unfortunately, this will entail more waiting, and we all know how I feel about that.


For now, Osama and his colleagues appear to be lying low. They have chosen a particularly good place to live, given that they cannot be extricated from their hiding places without the entire removal of my husband's duodenum, but perhaps that will be the next step. If we do opt for another surgery and the evil demons are indeed removed, I'll make sure to take photos to send to the National Enquirer just in case we can see the evil Al Qaida operatives' faces in them. Might as well collect the reward while we're at it...

6 comments:

Jerri said...

Kari. Oh, dear Kari.

This writing is funny, but the subject is so not. It's frightening and frustrating and all kinds of other ings.

I'm lighting a candle for each of you. You're both in my heart.

Blessings upon you both. The girls, too.

Jenny Rough said...

32 biopsies? Have you read Sue Monk Kidd's When the Heart Waits? I know books don't "fix" things, but I thought of it when I read this post.

Michelle O'Neil said...

Kari,

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Keeping my fingers crossed for the best possible outcome.

Deb said...

Laughing and crying right along with you my friend. I ditto Jenny's recommendation of When the Heart Waits. It actually helped me through a rough waiting patch a while ago. I'm glad you're able to keep writing.

Suzy said...

Prayers and good thoughts from the East Coast.

Kim said...

More prayers and good thoughts coming from the East Coast.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Your strength and ability to find humor are incredible.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...